Death Reflection

I do not know how I will be dying, but I imagine it will be when I am an old woman, preferably of old age, satisfied with the life I lived and now waiting to go on to something better. At the moment of my death, I see myself in the comfort of my bedroom, provided by one of my children, reflecting back on the wonderfully mundane life I have lived. I am not one to seek for great adventures or do grand things that will affect people on a wide scale. Instead, I am more a mild introvert on the social scale, who wants to live a normal life, experiencing life in small moments such as taking a stroll in the park or taking a vacation trip with my family. Being the hopeless romantic that I am, my life would be the idealistic, traditional cookie-cutter version of what a woman’s life should be. I would have graduated college, entered a teaching credential program, and became a High School Spanish teacher. A typical night would be grading papers and preparing next week’s lesson plan, staying in reading a good book or watching an inspirational movie, going out to eat with coworkers, catching up with my sorority sisters and seeing our sisterhood flourish, visiting family and family friends, or going to the club or bar once in a blue moon. I might go to graduate school to earn my Masters or PhD if I ever decide to teach a higher level of education. Unexpectedly, I will bump into my future husband at the local coffee shop, work, or family celebration. We will have a beautiful wedding with all our friends and family present, and then honeymoon in romantic Italy or Mexico. Meanwhile he is at the office and I at school, our dog Blue will watch over our house. Within a couple years, our family will expand by four new members, making my parents and parents-in-law ecstatic. As our children grow, we will take them out on family outings and vacations so that they can explore and see the world the way I never did at their age. They will graduate from college, work in their respective careers, and start families of their own. We would be the best grandparents- spoiling our grandchildren with trinkets, telling embarrassing stories of their parents, providing an ear when they had no one else to go to. After retirement, my husband and I will take a trip or two to the places we always wanted to visit but never did. We will spend the next couple of years doing the same routine, and making some memories here and there. On the saddest day of my life, my husband will have had passed, and my family will be there to comfort me. With time I would adapt to living without my husband, trying to carry the family traditions we set forth. When I turn too old or tire of loneliness, I would give my house to one of my children, and live out the rest of my days with my family, making new memories as an old woman or relating ones of the young woman I was. As I anticipate the nearing of my death, I will make preparations so to leave my family in good hands, while I prepare myself for the next step. Although I might not have discovered the cure for cancer or made the next big musical album, I would have happily passed on knowing I made a difference for my students, friends, but most importantly my family. Life might not have been as adventurous or exhilarating as many wish it to be, but that is the way life happens. Life never turns out the way we hope, but you'll just have to learn to do with what you have.